La musique: Je t'aime- Les Savy fav

Wow. Suddenly all is right in the universe. I am having more and more reasons to be really happy, most of which I don't feel like discussing here.
One good reason- It's Friday fuckers. Bring the drink.
The pessimist in me is already wondering when shit is going to turn horribly wrong.
Shit, I'm out of cough drops.
And so it starts....

La musique: Raining blood- Slayer

I've been hating coming to work more with each passing day. However, this morning the power died. The generator failed to go, and none of our computers, phones, etc. worked. So 2 hours of sitting around was had. Good times.
Very little is new. Well, I have a date tomorrow, which is kinda cool. And I should get my taxes filed shortly, which should mean a good time to come. But it's back to hell for now.

La musique: The Vines again. What a great album.

I ended up with the nickname "Poncho". It was a great fucking party and I ran into a lot of people I haven't seen in a while.
Ryan- You were the last person I expected to see. And both Anstey Brothers in one place, wow.
This is what it's like when worlds collide.
I met a lot of new people too and had a good chat with a chick I really dig. I only remember flashes of the bar, by all counts a successful evening.

La musique: winning days/ the vines.

I don't really have anything to say that's especially entertaining. I've been home watching movies for a bit due to my heroin addiction/gonhorrea infection/moo-shoo jungle flu. Lost in Translation was good, School of Rock was Ok, And I particularly enjoyed Nurses in heat.
Sunday is Coranna's birthday, so tonight a sizable posse will be drinking then doing... something. Maybe I'll get geared up in American Eagle and go wash the dog with some UPEI hockey players at the wave. I would like to see The Trews, but I hate that joint with passion.
It should be known though if you do see me, I likely won't know your (or likely my own name) so feel free to take advantage of me.

La musique: sabotage- Beastie boys

Matt: "I feel like murder."
*dead white look appears on supervisor's face*
Matt: "Oh, um that means I feel sick."
Supervisor (regaining composure): "Oh."

I need NYQUILLLLLLLL!!!

La musique: angry french people.

Ever see Requiem for a dream ? Jared Leto plays a heroin addict who's life goes to shit (As apposed to all those heroin junkie success stories). Anyways, he gets a huge infected necrotic wound on his arm, continues to shoot up into it, and ends up having to get it amputated.
I think of that everytime I look at my arm. I gave blood a week ago today, and I have this huge motherfucking bruise in the crook of my arm that's rather noticible. My mom said it's nothing to worry about, but for the time being I look like an extremely well fed junkie.

La musique: turbonegro.

A lesson lumped is a lesson learned. This weekend we learned that if Matt is fucked up, and you ask him to punch you, he may refuse, but hang in there.
Winners never quit and quitters never win.
Ask him again, and he may break your nose.
The victim seemed fine, the bystanders, less so.
Why would Matt do that?
Because Matt is an impulsive drunk idiot. End of Story.

All punches in the nose aside, it was a pretty good weekend. I got to See Kill Bill Vol. 2 while being ultra stoned on Saturday and the rest of that evening in particular went rather well.
But by far the highlight of the weekend happened Saturday evening. A fascinating blonde approches me at the gathering I was attending. I believe "hi"s were echanged. Then the blonde lays this on my rum and coke addled brain:
"I have something to tell you, but I don't want to sound creepy..."
*awkward silence*
me: "Uhhh... o.k."
"I've actually read your webpage before."
Now seriously. I really love when this happens. I've met a few people online who've stumbled across here. But meeting some in person for the first time but already knew so much about me, well, kinda blew my fucking mind.
Her name was Kristen she was very friendly and had a fine taste in rap music. She said I tend to be rather vague, and that I likely wouldn't remember all that. But oh I did.

La musique: Pour some sugar on me- Def Leppard

I went to trivia for the first time in a while last night. Team 'Dear Diary: Jackpot' consisted of Me, Tyler, Nic, Jeff, and Dave.
Reasons New Myrons trivia sucks:
(i) No Joel/John Michael
(ii) No Cheap Pitchers
(iii) Only one (shitty) brand of cheap beer.
(vi) Obnoxious hosts
(v) Increase in incidence of fish-human contact.
(vi) They started charging cover at 9:30. 9:30! Wtf?! almost an hour before trivia started . I looked at the girl and said "you're fucking retarded. It's 9:30. And I was already just in there." She shrugged, looked at the bouncer, who also shrugged, then stamped my hand and let me in.
Reasons I tolerate it:
(i) When you knife edge chop bouncers across the chest causing them to drop and break a beer bottle..... nothing happens.
(ii) I can still win bar tabs like a motherfucker.

So we won. Mayhem ensues. I had another spirited convo with hot coatcheck Heidi about basketball. The Lakers? Ha.
Rob, Andrew, and Jamie eventually show up, followed by enthusiastic celtic hardcore breakdancing, followed by equally intoxicated stammering between Joel's sister and myself.
I woke up in my car. And drove to work.
shit.
8 hours to go.

La musique: new millenium cyanide Christ- Meshuggah

Good morning Vietnam! Oh shit, I meant Iraq.

I saw this on the news last night. Mr Bush made a speech yesterday, he was asked "What is the biggest mistake you've ever made?" in the past Dub-yah answered "Trading Sammy Sosa" (He used to own the Texas Rangers).
This question was asked again to him stressing post 9-11 mistakes. He studdered, said: "Wow, I wish I had a chance to hear these questions ahead of time" (it surprized me that he hadn't) then silence, then: "Hold on I'll think of something" then... nothing.
Either there's too many mistakes for him to pick which one is the biggest OR he doesn't want to own up to any mistakes OR he honestly doesn't think he's made any mistakes.
I laughed myself to sleep.

La musique: Last day on Earth (live)- Marilyn Manson

You can't change the world, and if you try, you just end up destroying it. We love all things to death, leave the lights on, turn everything up to ten and fuck everything we fear.
-M.M.

So the other day, something funny happened at work. Conversation as follows:
He was English, We did business that was required, the he asks me:

"You speak two languages right?"
Me: "Yes"
"Oh, I thought so. I speak French too, so that's why I noticed. But your English is really good though..."
"Uh... thanks. (I am English motherfucker)"

Then it happened AGAIN, I don't remember the conversation, but he mentioned I had a bit of a French accent.
Seems I've developped an accent different from my cultural, linguistic, and genetic background.
Fuck.
I should be a spy.

La musique: I'm afraid of Americans- David Bowie

I feel somewhat obligated to explain my distaste for Americans.
It's hard for me to justify it without sounding like a stereotypical asshole. Mostly because to a certain extent, I am. Though instead of basing my opinions on a select few I've dealt with, this is a LARGE motherfucking majority.
For starters is doesn't help that America's elected leader is bordering on insane. He's all about getting ahead at the expense of other things (human rights, natural resourses, economic prosperity, etc.) I could back this up, but this is a blog entry, not a paper. The fact that this is the man representing Americans does not bode well for my (or many others') opinions of the populous. Queue the Secret Service knocking on my door.
I have found most Americans I've dealt with the be rather ignorant, close minded, and extremely ethnocentric. The stats don't lie:
-Only 2% of Americans can name Canada's prime minister.
-40% of Americans haven't read a book since they left school, and the same percentage say they don't follow international news because they don't think what happens outside the U.S. can possibly affect them.
But I digress...
There's other little things like sports rivalries, idiots that call here and yell at me because they have the wrong number, and so on.
That being said. Saying all Americans are alike is like saying all Canadians are against the war in Iraq. To say I hate all Americans would be displaying all the traits I'm criticizing. To conclude, I'm down with Americans (and people in general) who aren't fucking idiots.
End Tirade.

La musique: nirvana x a million.

Dear diary: Jackpot.

The Bruises are indicitive of a good weekend. Some are from trying to break dance, others from trying to leap down a good number of my stairs, others still from getting gang raped into a speakerbox, then there's my ass cheek. If someone told me I was hit in the ass with a baseball bat I wouldn't be at all surprized. Others still are a mystery.
A brief synopsis-
My Party was wicked fucking hot. Fireworks, running through cemetaries, dog after dog after dog, and all other things found only in Fort Augustus.
A sample of the dialogue:
"Dont worry about Matt, he's still pissed about tianamin square." -Andrew T.
"Man, fuck off, dance knows no gender." -Me
"Naw, Matt's a gentleman." -Some liar
Saturday night, after a few Corona with Chris I decided to take in the Nirvana tribute at Melon's. My ears will never forgive me, but being up front screaming my fucking head off up front with me boys was dy-no-mite. The vibe in there was incredible, as different as we all were, I felt a connection with everyone in that bar. Hard to explain without sounding like an idiot, but a great effing time.
I found Chris and some chicks and we went for Chinese and crashed.
Check out pics of the party Chuck B. style @ www.fryingcarrot.blogspot.com

La musique: she wants to move- N.E.R.D.
beat it.
Me and Coworkers have assembled enough money to :
a) Get two bottles of bacardi 151 to make some kind of crazy voodoo death punch.
b) Assemble enough beakfast foodstuffs to feed THE WORLD for Saturday morning.
c) Buy an Oompa Loompa. And a cage. And a cattle prod.

La musique: Who rocks the party?- Les Savy Fav

So yeah, I'm having a party.
COME.
Bring some tang.
It's the drink of Astronauts.

La musique: See below.

So many people have done this so I'm not sure who I'm ripping off anymore, but I have some time to kill, so here goes:

If my life were a movie, it's soundtrack would be as follows.

Opening credits: Blind- Korn
Waking up scene: Spy break- propellerheads
The low self esteem looking in the mirror after a shower scene: The leaving song pt. 2- AFI
The try on entire closet in a matter of seconds scene: Date with the night- Yeah yeah yeahs
Average day scene: Days of the week- Stone Temple pilots
Best friend scene: The way- Fastball
Getting drunk with best friend scene: Mr Jones- Counting crows
Happy dance scene:Wicked and weird- Buck 65
Wild reckless party scene: Who rocks the party?- Les savy fav
Morning after scene: Where did you sleep last night?- Nirvana
Love at first sight scene: Everlong (acoustic)- Foo fighters
First date scene: Magic carpet ride- Steppenwolf
Best sex of your life scene: Sex (I'm a)- Lovage
Catch lover cheating scene: When good dogs do bad things- Dillinger escape plan
Break up scene: modern romance- Yeah yeah yeahs
Casual sex scene: Closer- Nine Inch nails
Long night alone scene: I miss you- Blink 182
Fight at home with parents scene: 7 words- Deftones
Mental breakdown scene: Sanitarium- Metallica
Suicide attempt scene: Suicide is painless- Marilyn Manson
Driving in the rain scene: Standing in Rain- Billy Talent
Deep thought scene: Home- Staind
Flashback scene: Cats in the cradle- Harry Chapin
Regret scene: Miss you love- Silverchair or 4am our lady peace
Change in lifestyle scene: Waterwings- Alexisonfire
Get back together scene: Stellar- Incubus
"Life's okay" scene: Clint Eastwood- Gorillaz
Death scene: Hurt- Nine Inch Nails
Closing credits: Drain the blood- The Distillers