Sunday, February 26, 2006

I suck at life.
I suck at Math. I suck at typing, I suck at making friends, I suck at being friends, I suck at music, I suck at humor, I suck at love, I suck at sports. I suck at being myself, but that's good because who I really am sucks so much.
I drink so much and I smoke so many drugs because they help me numb out the suck.
There's nothing I'm good at. Maybe like, grammar and drinking pepsi. I cannot think of a single thing I can do better than anyone else. I was trying to think of things I'm good at on my ride home, as some sort of feeble attempt to make myself feel better, and the only thing I came up with was: "I'm good at being perenially god-awful at everything." I'm the fucking Tampa Bay Devil Rays personified. I thought of driving my fucking shitbox of a car into a telephone pole, because I would own at that. I'd hit it so fast and square that the the guys on the scene would be like: "That motherfucker creamed that thing. Thirty years as a coroner, never seen anything like it."
At that would be the story of me.

Here lies Matt Ling
(1982-2006)
Motherfucker Owned at Hitting Poles with Cars.

I'm going to the hospital or at least a clinic in the morning, so if you don't see me for a while, that's why. It's won't be because I drove my car into a pole. Even if that would probably be the most badass tombstone ever.

5 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

nah, i think you're pretty awesome.

10:23 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

ps. you wrote this sunday night. whytf didn't you stick around hunter's! i had actually wondered where you went.

or maybe i was just too drunk then, and the time is off on this thing.

10:28 AM  
Blogger Martha-Anne said...

You are great at meeting people and making friends. I think you are so interesting and fun. Be happy! You are wonderful! :)

3:06 PM  
Blogger Matt said...

Sorry for not announcing my departure on Sunday, I was feeling miserable and not in the mood to discuss it.

5:51 PM  
Blogger jnelle said...

matt, you throw yourself down stairs like no other.

i've seen people try. they only kill themselves in trying.
you do. and you survive!~


ps did you get my second email from my work account? sometimes email doesn't send because of certain words in it, and i think i wrote 'nazi germany' in it.

10:36 PM  

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